Sometimes I want to find the tallest building in the world, close my eyes and fall from its rooftop. Sometimes I want to scream until my vocal cords weaken to the point of tearing, then continue to cry out in silence. Sometimes I want to bury my face in my pillow and sleep for the rest of my life, with only dreams to protect me. Sometimes I want to suffocate on green smoke and let my mind drift away until the reality of myself fades. Sometimes I want to slice so deeply into my skin that the red trickle never ceases its flow. Sometimes I want to never speak again.
Sometimes I feel as if the whole world around me is beautiful, and I bask in its glory. Sometimes I wish the sky would fall down on me, and crush everyone else too, so undeserving of life. Sometimes I want to fly away from everyone and never look back. Sometimes I want to yell at my creator and ask him why I get to be instead of the others. Why would he hurt my mother? Sometimes I want someone to wrap their arms around me until I stop fighting, until I stop blaming the world for every mistake I have made. Sometimes, I wish you would just shut up, and listen... I'd be okay then.
*If you or anyone you know ever needs anyone to talk to, I'm here... I love you.