I feel like a *****. I say a lot of really unforgivably cruel things To myself All day Everyday It's been years since I have spent a day Not muttering insults at myself But they are all true. I can't decide if truth or kindness should win when it comes to hurting myself emotionally.
I am such a *****. To myself. I'm sorry, I'm in one of those moods where if I look in the mirror I want to smash it. If I stare at my hands, I want to tear off all my fingers. If I think about the type of person I am I want to leap in front of a train at the train station. I'm in one of those moods where if you asked me to define the words ugly and worthless, I would give you the same definition twice: Me. Apologies for the self-deprecation. Iām not trying to be attention seeking, I just needed to express this. Writing has become my healthier alternative to self-harm.