in the spinning circles of mass disorder
and the emotions that run rampant

in the inconsistency of the love I deserve
and the ones who want to love me but can't yet

in the influences that taint my blood and mind and will
the caffeine, the smoke, the alcohol that sits for days distilled

in the fluidity of these numbered days
and memories only made beautiful because they're gone

in the never ending collapsing of one thing into the next
with my bewildered mind never escaping from itself to get some rest

Within the whirlwind that is my life right now I am anchored, I am humbled, I overflow with gratitude that in all the inconsistency He waits for me the same.  The sameness in His presence; the unchanging, unwavering, unalterable presence that is Him.
He will always love me; always forgive me.
He waits.
And in the shakiness of growing up, He gives me stability.