I've tried to make choices in the past
They always ended in downfall for my sanity
And I can't do anything but repeat them because
I love the feeling of lost control
I love to cry
To feel the tears streaming down my face
I love that nobody knows just how scarred
My stupid and thought out decisions
Leave me in the end
And it pains me to say that I'm addicted
To this certain sadness
I cannot live without this pain
Because then I'd be boring
Then I wouldn't understand other people's scars
Whether the ones I see lining their wrists and thighs
Or painted in the depth of their actions
And as a mental killer
I understand that the pain is more real for some people
Than it is for others
But it still exists in every person I've ever met
Because nobody exists without that sliver of pain
That they're addicted to
That makes them normal