Michael Bloomberg was awakened in an unfamiliar bed.
Restraining bands were on his limbs and also on his head.

“our sales are down across the board, our latest soda bombed.”
“While our truckers want to rub you out, We insist you won’t be harmed.”
“We are trying to convert you, There's no need to be alarmed.”

For this most unwilling witness Coke's jingle was replayed,
I cannot say how often, it went on for many days.
He was forced to watch commercials, all in praise of soda pop.
Big gulps were his nourishment, though he longed to make it stop.

Then, when his brain was Cola washed
And we finally set him free,
Michael Bloomberg bought the world a Coke
and sang in harmony.