I've noticed that my moods
Seem to be reminiscent of a pendulum
I can never experience intense happiness
Without a swift recoil in the opposite direction
Every moment of contentment
Every second of joy
Is matched with an equal measure of guilt
I begin to dread the very things
That bring me the most happiness
I begin to regulate my moods
Never letting them deviate too much
Trying my hardest to keep an equilibrium
Trying my best to steady the pendulum
Maybe I'm avoiding the worst of the pain
But at what cost?