I think I fell in love again, the other day

Because I can't stop thinking
about the way his fingers felt
as they brushed my skin
in that mindless, simple way of his
and I feel guilty for liking it

I think I fell in love again, the other day

Because the thought of his smile
makes me feel like I am made of sparklers
shining inside
where before there had been darkness
that I embraced

I think I fell in love again, the other day

Because my stomach feels like
its tying itself in knots
when I think about how temporary it was
how it felt like a moment of peace
carved out of a carcass of wartime

I think I fell in love again, the other day

And I'm terrified
because somewhere between you and him
between the doubts and the accusations
between holding hands and daydreaming
between not yelling and screaming on the inside
between memorizing your features and watching you leave
I found myself thinking that my love isn't good enough
and I struggle to drag my self worth up the mountain I threw it down for you