I smoke my last cigarette in a parking lot
all the way down to the filter.
That final exhale brings the worry and fear of when my next breath of hot air will be.
I am dependent.
I am dependent on open arms to catch me when my fall comes to an end,
I am dependent on the smiles that dance around me to let me know that now is a good time,
I am dependent on the tears that streak faster than my blood when all i want is to spill it all on the floor,
I am dependent on the knowledge of others to throw my mistakes at me like fastballs, I’m hoping for a home run but i took a bean and walked to first and never made it home because i’ve never had a home plate…
my life isn’t shaped like a ******* diamond.