I couldn't write you a poem
And that's how I knew
Because writing comes easily to me
Usually the words flow from me freely,
My feelings splattered on the paper in the form of stanzas and couplets
But not with you
The words caught in my throat
And that's how your love made me feel
Like I was choking
Overwhelmed with the newness of true love
Love I just couldn't return
As much as I tried
So I let you go
And the words came back to me
Flowing freely again,
Like the oxygen to my lungs
And the blood through my veins
Spilling from me like the tears that spilled from your eyes and mine as I so easily broke your heart
And now I feel nothing
Maybe I'm just that cruel,
Breaking your heart, calling it quits, because now you're choking
Now you can't breathe
Is it fair of me to make you feel like I felt these last few months?
A trade off, our happiness causing the other pain
So did I do the right thing?
Or am I cruel?
Your first time being in love, and what feels like my eightieth
Because all the feelings are the same
So close, but just not right
Lighting me up inside, but only for a second
And then the light goes out, and I grow cold
The happiness radiating from my counterpart almost comical when compared to my increasing apathy
So I let you go
Before my coldness got you too
For I'm not cut out for lasting love
Hopelessly pathetic at forming real relationships
I was hurt one too many times when I was younger
And now I'm scared and a little broken and I can't let my walls down
So sure, I'll settle for cruel
That's what you think of me anyway
The cruel girl who took away the only relationship you've ever invested in
I'm the only girl you've ever loved
And you're the only boy who has ever truly loved me
They say look for and hold on to those who love you
And I'm so good at pushing them away
But somewhere inside me I knew
I knew I could never be happy with him
So holding on would only do damage
And I wish people would stop saying that
Stop saying to hold on
Because just because someone loves you, doesn't mean it's right
And it doesn't mean you can love them back
And I couldn't
So I let him go
And maybe I'm cruel
Or maybe I'm brave
I'm probably just scared
But I did what I thought was right
And that has to count for something