12 years old,
A quiet girl with
A boyish wardrobe,
And a soft smile,
A front of the bus kind of girl,
Who cared nothing about fitting in
Or popularity,
As long as it meant keeping her 4.0 GPA.
A girl who didn’t say much,
A girl who just wanted to fade into the background.
Seduced by the idea,
Of having friends,
Pulled into a world,
She just wasn’t ready to join.
She sat in the front left seat every day behind the driver.
She never spoke a word,
Other than saying a quiet “thank you” as she got of the bus.
Until the day the boy sat down
Beside her.
She smiled as he introduced himself and offered to shake her hand.
And she introduced herself.
Speaking on the bus for the first time.
Every day she sat by him,
Every day he would have a clever joke to tell her,
Or a compliment to give her,
And she found him so mysterious,
The way he had at least five coffees a day
But never had too much energy.
The way he would touch her,
As if she was a novelty.
The way he seemed to care about her,
Even though she knew she wasn’t pretty.
That was probably the most confusing part of all.
But, one day, she knew something was different.
When she sat down he didn’t have a clever joke to tell,
And when he touched her,
It was a hand crushing down on her shoulder.
As he grabbed her hair,
Ripping it out strand by strand.
As he told her, how lucky she was to have him in her life.
And his bus stop was four before hers,
So he had just enough time
To be waiting at her front door
When she got home from the bus.
And he drug her out to the woods,
A place they always went together.
And for the first time around him,
She was terrified.
She knew she shouldn’t follow, but he wouldn’t let her pull away,
He only grabbed her hand tighter,
And wouldn’t let go.
And then he pulled out his knife
Pushing her into the dirt
As she scrambled for something to hit him with,
He grabbed her neck,
The cool blade against her skin,
And she couldn’t fight any more.
She gave up,
As he tried to take off her shirt,
She trembled,
And all he had to tell her,
Was the fact that she was lucky,
Because no one would ever love a fat girl
Could ever love a fat girl.
A twelve year old girl
Without her smile
A twelve year old girl with trust issues,
No friends,
And a 2.0 GPA.