you asked me what have you learned?
I learned that next time I can't tell anyone that i won't be here tomorrow.
I learned that if I use wrist bands no one will ever know.
I learned that people do see scars on your thighs,
I learned that my "zoning out" can no longer occur.
I learned how to shove a fantastic smile on my face,
I learned how to add light to my eyes,
how to laugh and make you believe it.
I learned how to imitate.
I learned that I will end by myself.
that there will be no goodbye.
I learned that when I say I don't care im beginning to feel it.
because this numbness hasn't gone away in a while.
I learned that it won't go away without help.
And I learned that im not strong enough to ask for help.
So, it is shoved down my throat.
                                              while my smile is plastered upon my face.
I have yet to come up with the answer to your question.
the, WHY?
they plague my mind. But I cannot let this lie waver.
I had already attempted once.
just didn't succeed.
I have yet to find a moment where I don't regret waking up.