I'm scared I'll get so lost.
I'm scared I'll lose my train of thought.

I'm scared I won't be able to stop,
that I'll lose control of this self onslaught.


I'm afraid of the relief I feel.
I'm afraid of the need I have for sharp steel.

I'm afraid of the red trickling down,
of this being my way out.


I'm petrified of wanting to leave everything behind.
I'm petrified of not having anything left for me down the line.

**I'm petrified of the world and what's in it,
of the carving horrors on my arm and wrist.