Maybe it's because change is on the horizon, and a new start is about to begin, but I realized that all I do is pity you. When something doesn't work out the way you wanted, you go right back to your old ways, as though it's actually going to fix all of your problems this time. You can't be clean for 3 days and expect the world to see you differently. It's a commitment. To yourself, to become a better person. If life *****, then do something about it. I did. So what's your excuse.