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May 2014
As the fire burns me alive, it feasts upon my skin
greedily ******* the oxygen from my lungs
I can feel the heat licking at my body
It started at my feet
But it won't stop there...
I can feel the Smoke filling me
With every gasp my weak body forces me to take
I'm given no choice
As the Smoke saunters into my airways
Slithers down my lungs
Down to the very last alveolus.

As the endless coughing begins, I ponder my actions
I think of what I did to deserve this
I know what I did
I sinned
An unpardonable sin

I was me

The flames continue, though I ignore them
Although the trepidation inside me burns just as badly.

I will not regret.
Why would I regret doing the only thing I was ever good at?
I was me.

I cannot beg for mercy
But I can stare into their eyes
Into their judgmental souls
I see what they do not:
They are not them.
Not a single person among them is true to self.

I smile

I breath in this staunch air, heavier than the blanket
of breathlessness that I've been enveloped in
for days now
Maybe years even
I'm sure
I think

A single tear tries to offer me one last aqueous solace
Before it withers in the heat

I still can't believe it all had to go this far

I cannot beg for mercy
I won't pretend I'm sorry
I won't let myself down

It's my turn now.
I will light the way.
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