this is a poem about the summer you dropped acid. this is a poem about the summer you called me and said you loved me. this is an insecurity. a sweaty-palmed handshake. a speech on something you only half believe in. I am nothing to worship, I want you to know that I am nothing and still want to come blow smoke in each other's mouths. this is a poem about the girl that said she wanted to kiss you but didn't. this is: lonely nights, big sweaters, my blurry vision, your pale face. this is a hallucination. I want to say- If she kisses your lips before I do, whisper into hers that she is not the first, the last or the only. I want to say- If she says she doesn't understand you, show her the photograph that laughs with your mother. I want to say- *everyone you love will leave for California. everyone who loves you will stay.