My favorite time of the day is the majority of six minutes that his attention becomes mine. He's something I'd love to wrap around myself and I'd imagine a warm feeling cooling the burnt edges and rough breaks easing the incessant aching that has become my life.
Something about the way he talks makes the world dissipate around us and for once I'm not drowning in myself but in him.
When he's here there aren't words beating my mind or feelings strangling me with bloodied fingers there isn't that urge to burn myself down and the sense that I'm not okay doesn't exist to him because I don't let him ask.
I'd much rather spend our time listening to him and always walking on his right side because I love to look up at him and see how the sun plays shadows on the creases of his mouth and the infrequent freckles that play in lines on his cheek the familiarity of his eyes that tell stories of ever changing blues and greens how he always tilts his head towards me when we talk.
When he crosses my mind (all too often) butterflies don't shift and shake they begin to awaken and tremble delicately nostalgia creeping in every crevice and I'm consumed in his essence.
And it's funny because he always tells me about her but I always ask. How he's never felt like this and how different everything is. It hurts me when he speaks of how unsteady they are upsets me how she won't love him like she should like I could.
In those six minutes something normal flickers inside me something reassuring.
Usually in our six minutes I ignore the irony that while he's falling for her I'm falling for him.
more catharsis. not really any editing, my apologies.