You wanted love, so you found it,
And when it strayed too far from your grasp,
You threw it away.
Traded it for some skin and bones
For your fingers to linger upon under sheets of darkness,
Pounds of despair.

I've been thinking about you lately,
But I'm not so sure why.
It was a battle between fate and me,
Guess who lost.

I remember your fingers like
The sunrise
They came to meet me every day
Anytime, anyway.

I'm not so sure why words are coming for you
Tell me though, have you come to hate me, too?
I've moved so far backwards but taken so many steps, you've been too far gone to see.
I wonder sometimes, would you even recognize me?

You were my first
And I sure hoped it would last.
But you lied to her,
And ran so far, so fast.

I was hospitalized again, a few weeks back
For the same old reasons,
At the same cold season.
I didn't need you this time, to get me back on track.

I wonder how you're doing,
If your makeshift love has made you whole.
I know these words aren't quite moving,
But I hope they play a role
In seeing where you stand now,
I'm not asking for forgiveness, no
I ask for your friendship.

I've found myself drowning in loneliness,
I hope you've found companionship.
Because I almost did, but he blew me away
With words like daggers; all the things you should never say.

I hope you read this.
I hope you feel okay.
May I be so bold to say
It is the old you I miss
So terribly.