Will I ever truly have you?
Will you ever let me be yours?
How can I compete with a past
that I wasn't even there for?
How do I help you forget
years of your life that's already spent?
I guess maybe it just hasn't been long enough yet
I read it in your poems
I hear it in you voice
I see it in your eyes
When you're feeling caught up in the fight
Do you long for her?
Do you dream of her as you sleep?
Is she the one thing to you
that I will never be?
Do you miss that life?
Do you miss your ex-wife?
If so where does that leave me?
Alone and playing a game I'll never
be able to beat
Why do you lie?
Why do you try so hard to hide?
It's like being caught up in a rip tide
and there's no breaking free
Are you going back someday?
Are you planning on leaving me lonely as can be?
Because I don't know if
I can be what you said you never really wanted
I can never be California or make a million dollars
And I can't be okay with competing with a dream
I don't condemn you for your past
I would never do that
So how can you do that to me?
How can you lecture me to get over it
When you haven't let go and placed your final bet
And I've already  laid all my cards out on the table
How do you spin me advice
and try to make me feel so unwise?
How dare you try and tell me how to live my life
When you are the one feeling so contrite
I've done as you have said
I've taken your friendly advice
and changed things in my mind
I've gotten over most of my pain
And in dealing with yours you are being feign
My heart is yours forever and always but
I won't keep playing Russian roulette
when every chamber in your gun is already loaded.

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