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Dec 2013
Emotions I'd lock away in a bottle
Heaving my foot harder on the throttle
Driving as reckless as this car can bear
If they could hear me, the people would stare
Because I was taxing the engine with e'ry mile
And it was worse when I'd fake a laugh or a smile
The more that I'd fake, the more I'd enclose
In a small envelope with the edges all rose
I'd pack more and more in, 'til it all would spill out
And rise to my lips in the form of a shout
But I'd bite on my lips 'til they bled ('til they bled)
And I'd keep all the shouts in my head (in my head)
And they'd never leak out, except when they did
How to express them? Well, I was just a kid
So I'd talk to my friends, but they were obsessed with games
And developing smart-assed remarks and foul names
None of them knew me, nor could understand
The shouts in my head or envelope in my hand
A slit for a thought, a fight for denial
The jury was loaded, my thoughts all on trial
No argument heard, it was senseless berating
And on the edge of cruel reason my emotions were skating
How to express what I knew was not reason?
The answer evaded me season by season
'Til it was said once, like a seed needing planting
A thought that grew out of my head, took my breath, left me panting
"You aren't Atlas, try as you might
All the feelings inside will **** you in a fight
You need to let out, like a quick-release lever
Find someone who'll ease your mind like, forever."
It took years to develop, since I first got the advice
Yet I was cast someone by the roll of dice
And little by little, my old ways would alter
My bottling acts would slowly falter
Three years it's been, and I'm surely the better
For unbottling things letter for letter
And sure, I've got stuff I don't say out loud
And things I keep private because I'm not proud
But still, I'm more open, and I'm also content
And it's as a result of the way I've been bent
Jared Eli
Written by
Jared Eli  California
(California)   
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