The rush of her skin and the rhythm of her breathing endlessly played in my head, relentlessly reminding me of the nervousness but perfection of that first night. The thought of her smile and the sympathetic tone of her voice sweetly synchronized with each rise and fall of my chest above the exhausted breaths I had taken.
The smell of her skin on that first night and the beautiful memory of her warm touch against the complexity of my aliveness left me cold and broken inside. Tears fall, but yet it still lingers on.
I could never forget how the sweet touch of her kiss awakened my lungs to a breath of life again, and I never wish to forget the sound of her warm, soft voice with tears in her eyes telling my deadened heart to beat again..And I laugh at myself as the tears roll down, listening to the shattering sound of the breaking in my heart. Knowing that I'd lost the chance to ever have a heart like hers, to have such a headstrong soldier fight for a soul so broken like mine again had me weak in the heart and my veins grew colder with each simple thought of it. I couldn't muster up the strength to find a simple smile to cover up the mess that had been made here, for I had loved a love I couldn't let to of. Each night I fall sleep with her beautiful, taunting memory on my ever so restless mind and all that lies within it. I awaken in an empty, cold bed as the blackened tears stain my face. My body remained still as my weakened arm outstretched to the edge of the bed searching for the warmth of her skin and the smell of her cologne on the pillows and sheets..I awaken only to find myself alone beneath the blankets in which we once exchanged body heat and the smiles that had finally become real, wishing her absence had been just a terrible dream.

My heart violently turns at the thought of always missing her, and yet I still need her..it's as simple yet complicated as that.
I'm sweetly broken, oh but babe...she was worth it. There isn't a time that I recall where she hadn't been worth it.