There's carollers outside my door
With the dreaded Christmas curse
They sing and sing and sing and sing
But, they only sing ONE verse

They ring the bell beforehand
All stand back and start to sing
I'm gonna do some rewire work
So my doorbell does not ring

They're from the church
They're from the school
They can not sing in tune
I can not wait for Boxing Day
I hope it gets here soon

They sing for cans of goodies
They open up their souls
I just wish they'd learn the whole **** song
Or they'd just all shut their holes

They come out every evening
They come out every day
I bet they've never heard a jingle bell
Or even ridden in a sleigh

Now, I like Christmas Choirs
It's not that I'm a Grinch
But, learn the words before you sing
It really is a cinch

It's a partridge in a pear tree
Not a bird stuck in a bush
These two cent hacks are able
To turn the nicest songs to moosh

Just knock and stand back silent
For three minutes, silent stay
Then I'll give you all ten dollars
So you will all just go away