There’s a lot of fear in me.
There are anxieties and worries so great,
it feels like they’re running through my blood.
I cannot afford to live like this but I am so afraid of saying and DOING all that I’m feeling,
that I do quite the opposite--
mostly due to my fear of messing things up for others.
I’ve been putting myself last in almost every situation I can
for a long time now.

I hate the backseat, that’s no word of a lie, but I won’t sell out.

Just once though, I’d like for things to go smoothly,
without these struggles I have to suppress daily.
I think I’d be far less liked if I did and said what I felt all the time,
but is that such a bad thing? shouldn’t people like me anyways?

Neverending chains of dread and uneasiness.