the light seeped through the window and i lay awake with my head on your chest
i watched as the sun rose and cast shadows along the structure of your face
i'd run my fingers along the edge of your cheek bone
and listen as you mumbled sweet nothings in your sleep

sometimes i wondered what secrets you kept in the hallows of your skull
so i'd play with your hair and attempt to sneak my way into the life you'd locked away
sometimes i wondered if those secrets were the reason you became so cynical
and if those secrets were the reason you no longer talked to your father

the sun rose higher and played tricks on your arms
the arms you'd covered in purple and blue bruises
some days i wanted to reach into your skin and pull those blood vessels closed

eventually you'd wake and see me staring again
staring at your questionable eyes
blue, green, brown?
a combination of all three

and the sun would be high in the sky shinning through our window
creating mirages all over the lavender room that matched the spots on your skin
you'd smile and pull me close because your only reaction was to love
love someone else, but not yourself