Nov 2013
Tonight I have been overcome by the weary darkening of overwhelming feelings. They pulsate through my veins, taking control... I fight all the frantic thoughts and I'm not sure what's becoming of me.
At times I don't care; I just want to be empty and so I push everyone away and close the doors around me.
I have lost my way. I've been dropped on a desert island and it's just me here, alone with my thoughts. My head has become a war zone.
You see it doesn't matter how you try to escape it, doesn't matter how hard you try to run you'll never run fast enough. For it has no features or feelings, it is flat and lifeless yet it hates me and seeks to ruin me more than anything else could. If I were to die would it be gone to? Its only reason for existence is to wreck me. There's nowhere to go from here.
I will leave this life...
At times I don't care; I just want to be empty and so I push everyone away and close the doors around me.
I have lost my way. I've been dropped on a desert island and it's just me here, alone with my thoughts. My head has become a war zone.
You see it doesn't matter how you try to escape it, doesn't matter how hard you try to run you'll never run fast enough. For it has no features or feelings, it is flat and lifeless yet it hates me and seeks to ruin me more than anything else could. If I were to die would it be gone to? Its only reason for existence is to wreck me. There's nowhere to go from here.
I will leave this life...
I'm not doing this again tonight - fighting all of this inside of me. I can't - I'm way to tired to do it anymore. Bury me with my blanket - you can keep the rest! Let's face it - there may be a 'minute' of feeling pain-free. But honestly, isn't this terminal? I'm too tired to do it anymore. Not tonight. See you soon, Jimmy!
