My therapist told me
I show symptoms of OCD
But I do not have it

My days are full of fowl
images
that spread through my brain
like water

I hold my chest
and whisper goodbye
to my mother

Only I know of the
fatal accident
that will take her life today

I keep the thoughts close
like toddlers running off to get into trouble
If I lose track of them
They will become the truth

I'm used to these thoughts
they used to shake me to my core
they don't anymore

I'm prepared for the worst
I tell myself