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Apr 5
It's Carton Juicer Thing Chew More Day again, so let's have a party in *** Town! I'll bring the gasoline, and you can stop being a **** for 5 minutes if you're up to it! Women come in 4 versiions: dumb, stupid, imbecilic and idiotic. I spell 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 with an extra 𝘪 because I'm a rebel. The sunny Sunday morning sun brought out the sweet songs of many birds beyond my cracked window. I opened my sleepy eyes and wondered out loud: "Does Walmart sell bird poison?" I awoke to the angelic melodies of colorful birds in the rose bushes and willow trees just beyond my bay window, compelling me to open my tired eyes and whisper out loud to my **** neighbor with the wide ****: "Does Lowe's carry bird poison?" A lover from my distant past had a **** deformed by jagged bullet wound scars and so, to this day, whenever I'm ******* a ***** with bullet **** scars, I can't help but to think lovingly of my old girlfriend. Helicopters are dangerous inside your house. Don't be one of those guys who keeps a big helicopter in his bathroom. You start that thing up in the shower and it'll chop your **** off!
The Suzy Berlinsky Happy Show
Written by
The Suzy Berlinsky Happy Show  Simpang Bedok, Singapore
(Simpang Bedok, Singapore)   
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