I JUST KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN! As a troubled teen from a broken home, I knew what it was like to be plagued by self-doubt. My parents were independent swingers who enjoyed the intimacies of others because they had an open marriage. One day, as mom was "entertaining" 3 truck drivers, dad was in the swimming pool "waxing his carrot" and "choking his chicken" after "bleeding his lizard" for several *** skanks who dropped by to "get their knuckles dusted."