Help, My *** Has Turned ******!!!

You’re a bi-****** as a oneself & you’re able to impregnate yourself
without humpin’ your 2-ton mommy or her **** we all call Tommy
whose crucifixion complex could toss Jesus off His divine golf cart
before the Holy Ghost from our Trinity’s Godhead decides to depart
so as to be a ****** Cairo, Egypt Great Pyramid lab-mouse *******
who ain’t scared to hack off his nose to live as a big-mouth breather
Regardin’ some people, you can tune a guitar but you can’t tuna fish
with Bob Stack’s hay stack needle tugged from the *** of Lilly Gish
moments before she received her Hershey Highway back-door wish
without the hot dog bun, horse radish cream sauce & chutney relish
Michael Robinson’s ***** is intact after cosmetical lifts quite shady,
to become Michelle Obama: the 1st guy to be America’s First Lady,
with 2 breast implants, an inflamed Adam’s apple & a *** prostate
that Barry Soetoro strokes for Hillary Clinton, ex-Secretary of State
who scissors Huma ****** early, to munch Abedin’s fur-burger late
in the rockin’-chair posture that for this gay muffler sits automatical
like environmental pneumonia that is treated as non-opportunistical
When your head’s cold & painful hourly it’s blue lid con blah clock,
the first time large sodomites pork you as that new kid on the block
while your ** pigs out on ham sandwiches like lard-*** Mama Cass
you feel the bed-******’ urge to yell “Shut up ***** it’s Christ Mass!”
Slow down in slight places, you O.J. Hertz Rent a Car lobby jogger
because no hobbyest, steady at wobbling, loves a star hobby hogger
when pine knobs in the drain will work as a bad-*** knobby clogger
*** **** chemists are doing it though they claim it’s not food-grade
the vanilla extract synthesized from cow **** that cools in the shade
No you can’t use them big checks & debit cards before you are paid
while syphilitic trauma rots cortical bark for a butler & his fat maid
whose camaraderie is a syndicated-business-share differential inlaid
After the dog pound gassed my small cats, Jehovah sent me big rats
to tragedize the tragical rat-poisoning deaths of Newkirk belfry bats
in a hamlet what cares not for boys or girls or old women or men or
surgeons who cut Bruce Jenner’s ball vas to make him a loose tenor
All I want for Xmas is my ***** stomped like ***** Cooley’s wife,
till there ain’t no ***** dope-dealin’ left in my *****’s doped-up life
for burn-unit help in cooling the cauterization of pyrophorical strife
that’s more back-stabbin’ friendly than a big sike-a-**** with a knife
I have been critically wounded very mortally by Cupid’s lone arrow
that has cut my ulna arm bone right through its stupid bone marrow
like it broke for ****** sike-a-dikes Bonnie Parker & Clyde Barrow
under the Tommy guns of monkey-****-eating **** Clarence Darrow
who made the widest lanes on the streets of logic illogically narrow
to constrict the spastic free-will of free-wheelin’-sassy Cissy Spacek
with the wish of recreatin’ a Forest Lawn-spazzy Missy encasement