I was going to write a poem about you again Crying In my bed wrapped in a ball Thinking about old stupid **** That made me so worthless and powerless Then I stopped I think I don't care anymore I mean I care But I don't About anything About nothing at all I'm worthless I hate every single inch of myself And I know I've been blaming you for me hating myself And its mostly you The mental part but Half of its my fault I hate everything about my 5'5 ,150 pound body I hate looking at myself I hate the way I made myself I'm so unhappy And I know I could wake up and say Well, it's time to Change and change myself But I can't I can't move I can't feel anything anymore I'm only 19 19 years of a ******* wasted life Allison who? Killing myself should not be a thought But every night He's my best thought This poem is terrible This wasn't even a poem I just have no one to talk to So I write on a website God if only I was brave enough To lay at night And just get it over with.