HOW I LEARNED TO SLEEP UNDERWATER TO HIDE FROM THE MAFIA! It wasn't easy at first (coming up for air twice per minute) but eventually I mastered the art of staying underwater for 45 seconds (thereby cutting my breathing-time by 12%). Now I'm safe and secure, knowing that if I ever come across a Mafia killer again I can easily escape by submerging myself completely underwater until he goes away in total frustration like the ******* that he is.