You felt like home, but home is toxic.
Though I took comfort in knowing, we understood one another.
The trauma bonding.
The need to share the darkest parts of myself.
And so formed an unhealthy obsession, clouding my judgement.
You made me feel like someone I wasn’t.
You put words in my mouth.
You didn’t understand me.
You made me out to feel crazy because you misunderstood my intentions.
You made me feel ashamed of my self deprecating and my defense mechanisms.
Ashamed of the things that have always protected my heart.
You lit the flame on the stove until the fire angered me.
Why did I go back for more?
This is not me.
I’m not a dumb girl.
I know I deserve better.
Thank you for making me walk away for good.
Because I had someone else.
And he’s everything you’re not...Communicative, invested in my pleasure, invested in me.
The sun has never shone so bright on the rainiest day.
How healthy and happy it feels.
To be reassured, appreciated, and seen.
To feel **** and confident and beautiful.
As you continue to search for something you'll never find.
Your soul is emptier than mine.
Any love I felt for you was false.
I wish I could take back all the things I shared with you.
I wish I could not feel the need to write about you now.
I wish I didn’t even think about you.
You’re not worth this space in my head.
You were never worth the space in my heart.