Never nut your butter under bread, my little L nut, M nut, P nut or I will go away today to saw a deep, tree-cut into your cheap, free ****.

“Honey, pass the crunchy peanut butter.” ~ “If you think that you are going to get away with dragging my reeking *** back from Tennessee like the last abusive biker then you better get a brand new brand of dandruff shampoo for your 'fro 'cause I ain't no *****'s hillbilly chill-monkey!” ~ “What?” ~ “Oh, nothing.”