its been seventy days and a few minutes more
since i've been trying with all i am to be alright
i know i will never be like the way i was before
someone who is bold and beautiful and bright
and has so much fight still left in her
that the world within me starts to unfurl
yet i end up on my bed, coiled and curled
hope flowing down my eyes making everything blurred
it hurts a lot yet i can't break and shall move forward
i don't know how to lean on a man's shoulder because i ain't a coward
but on days like today i wish he'd call me up or send a message
waiting for anything at all, even his hate or his caged rage
why? because i don't know what to do with all this love
that's still left in me for him, i can't seem to shove
so cry i, my heart out when i am on my own, alone
in the darkness of the night, i miss "us" in the glow of my phone
only to get up tomorrow morning to be abso-*******-lutely great
letting go of the girl i used to be, becoming a heartless woman with every date
-losing myself all the while i look for me