IS CRACKED AND STAINED

and older than my dog Pokey who's 16. It all began 23 years ago when my grandmother and me were camping high above the Grand Canyon in Arizona on a rainy night. We had just said our nightly prayers, removed our dentures and were ready to sleep when a gang of mountain lions came out of nowhere (just like motorcyclists) and jumped on our tent, collapsing it instantly. In the darkness I grabbed grandma as a meat-offering because these cats were hungry. "Shut up! I have another grandmother!" I exclaimed during the excitement to calm granny down which didn't work anyway.