DIARRHEA CHEATED ME OUT OF MY INHERITANCE! I was upside-down in Lake Huron on a cloudy day when a big ship came out of nowhere like a biker on ******. I swam left as fast as possible, but it was too late. The ship hit me and sank. All the sailors drowned. Years later I swam to the bottom and pulled the ship to the surface. It was just like the Titanic. I couldn't believe it till I took memory-enhancement drugs by the bucketful. Now I'm normal again, just like a biker on ******.