Big Nig & Patty McJohnson lived with their 4 children in a modest house near the Empire State Building and each rainless day Patty would hang laundry over the side of a cliff in their yard that adjoined the steepest part of the Grand Canyon. One day, as Nig was trimming a bush, the Eiffel Tower began to lean scarily towards the McJohnson garage. "Hurry Todd!" Nig yelled. "I need duct tape! The big roll!" Quickly Todd & Nig encircled the tower with a wide swath of tape. "That will keep her from falling!" Nig proclaimed. "What happened?!" Patty asked. "The Eiffel Tower almost fell on our garage!" Todd exclaimed, still slightly out of breath. "We secured it with duct tape!" Later, after 23 hurricanes passed over their house, one after another, a volcano erupted, spewing a wave of lava 67,000 feet high. Fortunately Nig had prepared 2 dozen extra-big sand-bags to divert the flow.