I'm living in a sort of dissociated daze
I don't feel real. I don't feel the warmth or love or intimate affection that I used to amongst supposed romantic partners. I feel detached and dizzy, ill.
I've gone through this before however, countless times. Numerous personality changes. I was different a month ago, more assured, more positive and in a spiritual frame of mine. Now I'm slightly nihilistic with a lingering fantasy for homicide; I wonder how it'd feel stabbing and gutting someone because I know it'd be like stabbing myself; we're all manifestations of the same spirit (energy). You're me, and I'm you. When you take a **** in the morning , I feel you expending that waste.

But this is rambling. I guess the point is im here and I'm getting tired with these life circumstances. I am merely existing;, and the remedy is to live spontaneously. I don't want to die with regrets. I made it to 30 (almost). Time to see if it was all worth it. But really it's nothing too serious. It's a joke really; give up, and find freedom. Let it all go, let all the prejudice die. Youre not what society or your parents expect from you; you are a being of free agency, alive and in the present, beautiful, fearless, unmolested, still born