Would You Believe It

I spent most of my childhood
in the falsehood of truancy
I spent my teens avoiding
all social participation
I spent my early manhood
in dark smokey pubs
I spent all of my money
acquiring substance addictions
I spent much of my time in a
state of permanent loneliness
I spent months and months
in psychiatric hospitals
I spent times among you hiding
my depths of depression
I spend many of my waking hours
contemplating how to suicide.