After
Nights like this
Hundreds of drinks later
Hundreds of people
Shallow like the thick air
You breathe in there

After
Total ups and downs
Oh what euphoria it is,
Riding out highs to the ground
Past the point of throwing up,
Throwing it all away

When the shakes stop
Your fists still hurting
From punching the door
On your way out
"I'm taking five"
A small number

A couple breaths
Curled up
Next to the toilet
Completly overwhelmed
In and out
Should I just go?

Dancing
Behind the stick
Pouring promises of a quick escape
No remorse's found here
No moderation cause
"Tonight we go big
Time to forget ourselves"
To let go of all reason

Melting bonds
Together with your people
We've gone through the fire trials
Together
We do it, again and again
Together

When you can't smell the smoke
Any longer
Hovering in the air
When you can't hear the music
Anymore
A "boom, boom, boom" to the background

When your sweat forms a salty smile
On your shirt
Your face, a pale grimace
Void of any emotion
At this point
Teeth clenched, throat sore
You don't matter anymore

It's us against them
Who will give in first?
Their thirst for more
Or my arms, my legs,
My patience?

They are a constant demand,
For more
Total ignorance,
In pure bliss pure preassure
Ego printed out on paper
Left on the table or thrown at you
On their way out
Pick it up when you clean this mess

When it's over for the night
You come to a stop
Silence
As the world wakes up
And comes alive again,
Slowly

The sun gently lights your face
On your way home
A bit of shelter
Warmth and quiet
A bit of peace

Finally excused,
You hurry home
A couple hours of rest and resignationt
The adrenaline wore off
Put a check behind yesterday
It's over and done

Four, five, six
Hours
A quick bite, sleep, repeat
Rest
The to do list of today
Already delivered to your pocket

Time's up
You blinked twice
You said you wouldn't do that anymore
Have to get going now, have to get back
Have to function again
Be there in five

Only then it is,
That you realize
You enjoy losing yourself
In the struggle
In this swirl ******* you in
Deeper and deeper

Time passes
Quicker and quicker
Just a little more
And I can give up
I can give in

And leave everything behind
Leave all reason
Leave all trouble
Awake but unconscious
Dead or alive
Night or day

Look,
How messed up you have become
For a nicle and a dime
Your life's gone grey, gone grim
Gone bitter

It's after nights like this
That you get the hint of a feeling
That you went wrong somewhere
Togehter with a clear feeling
Of deserving it
You deserve to end here