I crashed my car
Thinking about you.

Standing in the debris,
I thought about stepping into the street.

Because I can’t call you
And ask for a ride.  
You won’t come get me
And save me from the headlights.

Last night I counted pills
Hoping there would be enough.
But tonight, I braked when I saw lights
Racing faster than a second blink.

In the glowing red
I saw your smile,
Your warm brown eyes.

As my head smacked the seat,
I felt your hands in my hair,
Putting me to sleep.

I heard your laugh
In the crunching metal
And tasted your lips in the exhaust I inhaled.

So this is how you love me,
As careless and distracted as I drive.
You were always
An accident waiting to happen.