a month of crying felt endless
2 weeks of finally
being able to look at photos of memories
gathered
no longer bother and faze her
she finally felt safe
she finally could smile
she finally no longer thought of him
how is it that
on this day it hits her like a thousand pound weight
crushed on to her chest?
she can't seem to catch her breath
her cries are Lauder then ever
  10 times more painful than before?
how can this be
to the point she pulls out her device
that can end all of it
she'll never feel anything
ever again
and at this moment
that's all she wants
relief from the torture
that her hope, love and heart has put her through
she opens he laptop
writes frantically
knowing it may relieve her
constant addiction of ending everything.
the writing only gives her relief temporarily
it's in her peripheral
it sits right beside her
the thought of her thoughts
and emotions
finally at peace
sounds so **** beautiful