Dear Disgruntled, Morose and Disaffecteds
you are cordially invited
to send all your doubts pains and insecurities
and we will gladly help you
recycle and dispose of them back in the cess-pits
of your inadequate minds
This is a free public service for all the ******* people
who are so so full of it
Please avail yourselves of this rare opportunity
failure may cause self-poisoning
or you may self-combust from toxic gases explosion

Royal Borough of Whitnits Bayers