the pressure to have to say “yes” after so many years of “no’s” is real
an old friend invited me
at nine fifteen in the evening
to a fair in the next week
the next few days actually
and my skin was crawling
when i had to answer quickly
they want me back after all these years?
do they want to be my friends?
who suggested that i tag along?
who in their right mind?
wait till you see how ugly i am
wait till you see how lonely i am
how impaled by social anxiety i am currently
i promise that it’s not my only personality trait
i don’t think i can deal
i can’t operate around who i haven’t seen in forever
i feel under the weather
i want to go home
and be happy and fulfilled when we hang out
on saturday
please accept me into your group
i can’t wait to know you all again
please let me in
please don’t let my alarm clock ding
at three o’clock in the morning
haunted by your unwillingness to accept me
please
the tides keep rolling and rushing
but i can’t stop blushing
please accept me and don’t act weird and disassociate
kinda excited to see you on saturday