Sep 2013
I would be your friend.
I would be your lover.
I would be whatever it is you need that you can't define.
If, at 2 am, you were afraid and sad and alone,
I would hold you and never kiss your lips,
I would ease your pain and take with me nothing but my faith.
If you needed somebody to make you smile
And share a joke or a story with you,
I would listen and smile with my whole heart
And never reach out to comfort myself with your skin as proof
That you are solid and not imaginary.
I would sit and hear about the romantic night you spent
With him
And love the sparkle in your eyes that means you're happy,
And rearrange my heart to make room for the space that's not filled
And shouldn't be.
Don't ask me why
I would do that for you
And love it.
I don't know.
Never do.
But I can tell you that I have done it more times than I can count
For people much less extraordinary than you are,
Because all I want,
Truly,
When somebody suddenly and unexpectedly makes me happy
Is to do something for them,
Be
Something for them.
Anything they need.
You don't need a love today,
It's fine.
I will be what you let me be.
A confidant you know you can tell any secret to
Because to breathe a word you asked me not to would scald me,
A friend who will be more attentive than anyone you've ever relied on,
Because to make you happy is all I really want to do,
A silent companion for days or nights of loneliness
When nobody else could be trusted to let you be just what you are, whatever it is.
If you don't want someone to love you that way,
I hope you can still want me.
Because the day you made me feel whole was the day you made
The best friend you'll ever have,
If you want her.
The one for whom it's always fine,
Who will laugh at every joke and give you back every smile,
Who will give whatever you ask for
Not out of obligation but out of a craving to give to you.
Who will step back and melt into the shadows if you ask,
Closed up tight and tucked away until you need her again, brand new and perfectly the same.
If you want anything at all from life that you are not getting,
Ask me.
Let me.
I am malleable, I am what you want me to be.
If you can find anything to want from me,
Please,
Want it.
I will be that for you so passionately and completely,
And I will be overjoyed to be something, anything, to you.
I would be your lover.
I would be whatever it is you need that you can't define.
If, at 2 am, you were afraid and sad and alone,
I would hold you and never kiss your lips,
I would ease your pain and take with me nothing but my faith.
If you needed somebody to make you smile
And share a joke or a story with you,
I would listen and smile with my whole heart
And never reach out to comfort myself with your skin as proof
That you are solid and not imaginary.
I would sit and hear about the romantic night you spent
With him
And love the sparkle in your eyes that means you're happy,
And rearrange my heart to make room for the space that's not filled
And shouldn't be.
Don't ask me why
I would do that for you
And love it.
I don't know.
Never do.
But I can tell you that I have done it more times than I can count
For people much less extraordinary than you are,
Because all I want,
Truly,
When somebody suddenly and unexpectedly makes me happy
Is to do something for them,
Be
Something for them.
Anything they need.
You don't need a love today,
It's fine.
I will be what you let me be.
A confidant you know you can tell any secret to
Because to breathe a word you asked me not to would scald me,
A friend who will be more attentive than anyone you've ever relied on,
Because to make you happy is all I really want to do,
A silent companion for days or nights of loneliness
When nobody else could be trusted to let you be just what you are, whatever it is.
If you don't want someone to love you that way,
I hope you can still want me.
Because the day you made me feel whole was the day you made
The best friend you'll ever have,
If you want her.
The one for whom it's always fine,
Who will laugh at every joke and give you back every smile,
Who will give whatever you ask for
Not out of obligation but out of a craving to give to you.
Who will step back and melt into the shadows if you ask,
Closed up tight and tucked away until you need her again, brand new and perfectly the same.
If you want anything at all from life that you are not getting,
Ask me.
Let me.
I am malleable, I am what you want me to be.
If you can find anything to want from me,
Please,
Want it.
I will be that for you so passionately and completely,
And I will be overjoyed to be something, anything, to you.
