~
I can't deal with this remorse from my guilty conscience.
chewed on my tongue to the bone, swallowed down fear until it hits the pit of my soul.
leaves me pale, what an inner grossness this is.
sweat?
or is this spit on my flesh from God.
stuck with myself - my sinister shadow sewn to the one who walks in the fresh sunlight.
~
thriving - soul - slowly - dying at night, my thoughts swarm - fester faster and faster
~
like a fish in bowel my home is purgatory ;
will I repeat?
will I repent?
how am I to feel normal
how can I if she isn't still here
I hear her voice over the phone
alone to her thoughts before the knot was wrapped
~
it was all my fault
~
her feet dangled above ground
a true angel levitating past this existence
my forevermore entangled in memory
until I perish