Doctor, oh Doctor

doctor, oh doctor, I'm feeling quite sick
have pains everywhere, even in my finger
my tongue is swollen, I can't even lick
my girlfriend replaced me, with a backup singer

doctor, oh doctor, I'm feeling so sore
had all night ***, with this old drunken lady
she tossed me around, even down on the floor
don't remember her name, but I called her Katie

doctor, oh doctor, I'm missing a sock
he took down my pants, and looked at my knee
he noticed that I, was wearing a ****
rubbed his chin, and said now let me see

doctor, oh doctor, I have a bad case of gas
he looked in my ears, and looked up my nose
said not to worry, that this would soon pass
now I am getting, cramps in my toes

doctor, oh doctor, I have this urge to spit
my stomach is growling, think I need to eat
my head is throbbing, my shirt is quite wet
sweat pouring off me, even my feet

doctor, oh doctor, why these bruises and cuts
I'm starting to feel, a swelling in my wrist
yes my lady has again, shown me the door
don't know what I did, to get her so ******

doctor, oh doctor, I'm bouncing off walls
do you see anything, wrong with my heart
is it broken again, is that the problem
or do I just need, to cut a big ****

Gomer LePoet...