So it’s getting to that time of year
Where I dream of you endlessly
With a gun against your head
And I can’t believe
It’s going to be 8 years that you’ve been dead

I hope you know
You turned my life upside down
How many stupid things I did
Because I had let you down

I didn’t see the signs
And I’m sorry for that
So ******* sorry that you’ll never know
I’m still waiting for your reasonings
A letter that’ll never come
But I’m still breathing to make you proud
Have I done that?
A college graduate at 22,
Have I done that?
Beating an eating disorder and this **** depression too.

Ill never know.
The only thing I’m sure of is that I watch out for the signs now.
Because suicide ended your pain
And started mine.