In just seven steps, you can find out:

• How to make the best scrambled eggs
        [pepper ‘n love]
• How to improve Scrabble scores
        [suffixes are our friends]
• How to buy a house
        [budget before sealing the deal]
• How to think like Leonardo Da Vinci
        [infectious curiosity and commitment]

But despite the obscene amount of time,
I spend scouring and scrolling,
I can’t seem to stumble upon,
The part of the Internet,
That has the instructions,
To keep your heart happy,
While keeping my mind sane.

Perhaps the sadness and insanity,
Will be a welcome change,
Allowing us to rediscover each other,
In the most honest light.