Kicking myself for getting so lost. Ashamed that I have gone this far.
Trying to find my way back home, leaving there with just a scar.
I am sorry I was gone. And I promise now that I will stay.
Sit back and listen to the story of how I almost lost my way.
I wondered through a hidden sea, and stumbled upon a hidden land.
The native people just like me,  filling voids to understand
Why they felt so sad, so lonely, and how could they make it better?
They never found the answers there, but suffered through the pain together.
They came there to run away. And leave the real world behind.
Even if just for the day, they searched for truths they couldn’t find.
The comfort of distraction, the addiction to feeling loved.
I ate it up and swallowed it, but knew that it was not enough.
I got lost along the way, placed my real life on a shelf.
Gave into the temptation and relief to show my hidden self.
I followed them, like a cult. I loved the way they made me feel.
But it was just manipulation, as pieces of me they did steal.
And rather than leave then, I swam back through the hidden sea.
I only wanted more of them. I wanted more of that version of me.
So I came back again and again. Lost inside this universe
And what I thought made me feel better, only made me feel much worse.
Deep down I knew, that I should leave and come crawling back to you.
So many times you pushed me there, until it became all that I knew.
But now I feel they’ve broken me. As I lay here bruised and wet with tears.
Awake from this toxicity. And ready to face the real life fears.
Kicking myself for getting so lost. Ashamed that I have gone this far.
Trying to find my way back home, leaving there with just a scar.