As I slowly begin to collect the memories of our existence together
the Lovely, the Painful,
       the Hateful,

I'm beginning to see
I loved you in no other way than furiously.

As if I were always on the brink of losing your love
yet also on the brink of having too much.

Always ******* out more
Than retreating when you used words like "Adore"

You had to rip out my heart so finally I could see
There was nothing more terrifying than you loving
and not loving me.

I was so afraid of how much I felt for you
I could not function with a love so true

Now all alone,
Sitting on my pride like a throne

Remembering our mistakes
And your  horribly beautiful face